1lostone | Cultural Differences aka the Spanking Fic

Author:

1lostone
Written for:

trek_hc exchange who requested Aliens made them dooo eeeeet!
Summary: Jim's having a bad day. Weird Dreams, Snarky First Officer... what's a Captain to do? Make sure his next mission goes well, of course.
Fandom: XI
Genre: slash
Characters/Pairings: k/s
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: spanking, YES I SAID SPANKING! Humor(?) angst, h/c...
Disclaimer: Yes, I do own Trek. Clearly. *shifty look* Well fine I don't own it but I make it do naughty stuff. Often.
A/N: Posted in several parts- +16k, complete. Thanks so very much to the ladies who encouraged me...

beedlebarg ,

yesterday_girl ,

romennim and

avictoriangirl and to

jademac2442 for her amazing beta. Anything messed up would be my fault cuz I have to mess with things after she sends it back. :D

So, without further ado...

Part 1

“No thanks is necessary, Kirk Captain. We will postpone the welcoming feast until later this evening. Please feel free to explore our planet in the interim.”

Jim had opened his mouth to respond when his communicator went off. “Please excuse me.” Jim knew his smile wasn’t exactly kind. Uhura kept looking from him to the Javorian council as though Jim was about to steal Spock’s phaser and start blasting away. Uhura and Spock moved to converse with the aliens while Jim moved out of earshot.

“Captain, this is Lieutenant Sulu. We have an incoming message from Admiral Pike, marked your eyes only.”

Jim barely restrained himself from jumping for joy. “That’s the best news I’ve heard all day.”

“Sir?”

“Nothing, Sulu. I’ll take it in the shuttlecraft.” Jim walked the few feet to the craft and entered the code to unlock the hatch, waiting somewhat impatiently for it to open. He stepped in and allowed it to shut behind him, striding to the communications console and coding in his key.

“Hey, Jim.”

“Admiral.” Jim could tell immediately that this was not a social call. Chris’s face was completely blanked of expression.

“We have a bit of a situation, here. How are the diplomatic talks going? Have the Javorians consented to throwing their lot in with the Federation?”

Jim rubbed the back of his neck. “Erm, well yeah the talks have stalled. They want to wait a few hours before resuming discussion.”

The Admiral sighed, resting his chin on the point of his joined fingers. “I was kind of hoping that you’d already tied this one up. Well, Jim I’m not going to dick around. You have new orders. Do whatever you can to get the Javorians in our corner. It turns out that some of the vegetation on Javor-IV when properly broken down can cure damn near anything up to and including the common cold. We’ve managed to keep the knowledge under wraps for now. All we need is for the Klingons to get wind of a miracle plant, and Javor-IV will be a dustball before you can turn around twice.”

“Oh. So, we’re to… what exactly?”

“Play nice. Do everything in your power to get them to sign the treaty. Observe and catalogue various specimens of the local vegetation for study. We have a little bit of time on this Jimmy, as long as we keep it behind our teeth.”

“Well, surely once the treaties are signed, the Enterprise will be needed elsewhere. Maybe something more important?” Anywhere that doesn’t involve this freaking planet.

Chris’s eyes narrowed in a way that made Jim feel like an errant schoolboy, even hundreds of thousands of light years away. “I’m not sure what you consider more important than a medical breakthrough that can save millions of lives, but I assure you. This is important, Captain. Pike out.”

The ‘…you fuckhead.’ was implied, but Jim heard it loud and clear.

Well, shit. Today really had been a clusterfuck sort of day, and it was hours from being over.

So he was stuck on the planet until they managed to get the Javorians to sign the treaty. Well, no. Longer because they’d still have to collect the specimens. Shit! Jim sighed and turned off the console, standing up and exiting the shuttlecraft. So much for his little milkrun of a mission.

Jim jogged down the ramp and over to Talok and his advisors. He bowed low, emulating the way Talok had first greeted him. First thing he’d do was fucking memorize Uhura’s briefing on these people so he wouldn’t make any further social gaffes. Jim rose from his bow, accidently brushing against Spock as he did so. Hell, my ass still hurts from the last time I fucked up. Surely he could make it to their quarters without another incident. Spock straightened even further, clasping his hands behind his back. Jim winced again. He was never sure how much Spock could pick up through a casual touch, but clearly Jim was going to have to do some damage control.

“Forgive my rudeness, Talok Governor. My officers and I eagerly await your hospitality.”

“No rudeness, Kirk Captain. I well understand duty’s call. Please, follow Kalena. She will make sure you are comfortable. Now, you must excuse me. Your performance earlier has made us impatient for the commencement of our business.”

Jim was good. He didn’t even snarl at the mention of a performance. His ass wasn’t happy with him, the fabric of his underwear and trousers chafing uncomfortably against the skin.

They followed Kalena down another maze of corridors, the three of them in a single-file line with a few attendants bringing up the rear. Finally they were left to a large suite of rooms. Kalena bowed down with one of the same sweeping bows and rose with a slight smile on her face. When she spoke, her voice was like a bell. “Kirk Captain. There is some salve for you should you desire the relief.”

And… that was just about the time that Jim started praying for a freak meteor shower.

***

“Captain, I think you’ve read that three times. We have about four hours before we are due to meet with the Javorians. With your permission, I’d like to begin a more in-depth study of their language.”

Jim had been staring at the PADD with such single-minded concentration that he only heard about half of what Uhura said. He’d figured out why he’d managed to piss off Talok. Between mixing business and pleasure, and not bowing it was no wonder. He’d broken two of the biggest Javorian cultural no-nos. Spock had absented himself about three seconds after Jim had briefed them on the new parameters of their mission. Uhura had been working at one end of the room, and Jim had began to memorize every single nuance of the Javorian culture. Which was kind of difficult because his ass? Totally hurt.

“Captain? Did you hear anything I said?”

Jim looked up. “Of course I did.” He shifted again and winced. “Of course you can go. I can’t blame you for wanting to leave. Language. Fascinating.” Jim winced at the word.

Uhura’s mouth twisted into a smirk. “How’s your butt, there, Chief?” She crossed to a replicator and ordered water.

Jim raised an eyebrow. “My butt is fine, Lieutenant.”

“Yes it is. Sir.” She laughed at the look on his face. “But all joking aside, do you need some help with that salve?”

“I knew it! You’ve been waiting five years to get your hands on my ass.”

She grinned over the cup of water.

“Besides, what would your boyfriend say? I imagine even Spock might have an emotional response to walking in with you rubbing that stuff all over me. I’ve already had his hands around my neck, thanks.” And his ass. And holy shit that was a weird thought.

Expecting another comment, Jim looked up from his PADD when he didn’t hear anything. Uhura was just staring at him of the rim of the glass, eyes wide.

“What?”

“Jim. Spock is not my boyfriend. “

Jim grinned, waiting for the punch line.

Uhura cocked her head. “Trust this. If he was my boyfriend, his hand would not have been on your ass.”

Oh.

“He hasn’t been my boyfriend for.. for awhile. How did you not know this?”

“Uh…” He couldn’t say. He’d just assumed. If Jim had the opportunity to date Spock, he’d do it in a second. Well, if Spock didn’t completely hate him or anything.

“While I’m studying you two should go back to the Enterprise to bring back some other of Spock’s team to help with gathering samples. I imagine Leonard is practically salivating at a chance to come down here. And Sulu is probably standing there besides him with a bucket.”

That was true. Sulu did sort of have a thing for new plants.

“So, I can go then?”

“Of course, Lieutenant. Go. Mix. Mingle. Make nice. I’m sure I can find something to do while you’re gone.” She smiled at him, tilting her head as though she wanted to say something else. Jim decided that the paragraph on Javorian waste distribution was just about the most interesting thing, ever and eventually she got the hint and left.

Jim shifted again in his seat and finally stood up. She left the room and Jim heard her speaking to the attendant stationed outside of their room in the Javorian language. Jim looked around at the opulent surroundings and set aside his PADD, almost running over to the small jar of salve that was setting innocently on the counter. He took off the lid and sniffed at it experimentally. It smelled something like cinnamon and something like rosemary, but not exactly like either one of them.

“I wish to ascertain if your posterior is injured.”

Jim fumbled the jar and it bounced against the counter. Jim managed to grab it before it shattered. He closed his eyes, trying to ignore the little part of his brain that was shrieking and flailing around like a little girl. “I’m fine Spock. You don’t need to ascertain anything. Did you find any samples?” James T Kirk was not a coward. James T Kirk had had weirder sex with tentacles for Christ’s sake. James T. Kirk could handle one conversation with his First Officer. If he could manage to stop referring to himself in third person, that is. He squared his shoulders and turned around.

“I did indeed find several viable specimens.” Spock seemed to be staring at something just over his left ear.

“Ah. Well, that’s good.” Jim forced a smile. “Uhura is going to start seeing if she can ferret out some of the nuances of the language. She suggested that we go back to the ship and bring reinforcements.” Jim walked over to the small seating area, sitting down in a chair and almost jumping right back up as his ass told him in no uncertain terms that it didn’t appreciate such rough treatment.

“Captain. I’m afraid I must insist.”

“Uh, yeah no. I’m fine, Spock. Please let’s never talk of this again. As sort of a special favor to me.”

“In the absence of Doctor McCoy’s presence, it is part of my duties as your First Officer to make sure that I have not harmed you. Please lie down on the bed.”

Fuck my life. Jim rubbed the bridge of his nose with his hand. “You did hear the part about us leaving? If you want a ride then come on. Otherwise, I’m out of here for a few hours.”

“Captain, I am sure that even you are aware of Starfleet protocol in a situation like this. If you wish to go back to the ship, then I must accompany you.”

Even him? Why is it that Spock, who professed to have no emotion, could always manage to make Jim feel like shit with just a few well-placed words?

Jim smiled tightly and stood up, ignoring Spock’s statement and walking over to the bed. Fine. If Spock wanted to make his ass feel better he was welcome to try. If nothing else, Jim knew it would discomfort Spock to no end to be forced to touch him again, and damnit he was just petty enough to enjoy that a little. Or a lot.

Jim stalked over to the door and opened it, sticking his head out of the small space. “Excuse me, ma’am? Could you please inform Talok Governor that I need to return to my ship, briefly but that we will be here at the appointed time for the feast? Thanks.” Jim smiled brightly and shut the door, turning the lock with a small click of sound. “Okay Spock. You win.” He stripped off his uniform shirts, wincing only slightly when the dried semen pulled at the hair on his abdomen. He tossed his shirts to the side and had a deep spurt of pleasure at watching how Spock’s eyes widened as he walked forward. “I told you that I’m fine, but if you want to make sure then you need to do it quickly.” Jim undid the fastening of his trousers and bent over, pulling off his boots, then kicking off his pants. He walked over to the bed in his black boxer briefs and stretched out onto his stomach on the mattress. “Well come on. Grab the salve. Let’s get this show on the road.”

Jim pillowed his head on his folded arms and turned, gaze caught by a reflection. After reading the information so many times, Jim now understood the inhabitant’s fascination with mirrors. They felt that they made it impossible for liars to remain untruthful. He wiggled a little then rose up on his legs to put a pillow under his hips. He had kind of a morbid curiosity to watch Spock administer to him.

“Spock? Today. We’re kind of on a time thing, here.”

“Indeed, Captain.” Spock almost jumped, turning away from where he’d been staring at Jim spread out on the bed.

Jim heard his booted feet as they crossed the floor to get the salve, then the slow, measured steps as they returned. Jim felt the bed dip a little and turned his head a little further, able to see Spock in the mirror. He took pleasure in knowing that Spock didn’t seem to realize he was watching him. He watched, fascinated as Spock reached out a hand that trembled slightly. Spock made a fist and opened his fingers, reaching out to the waistband of Jim’s underwear. The fabric was rough against his tender skin as Spock removed the material, leaving it below his rear end so that Jim’s entire ass was framed.

“See? I’m fine.” Jim’s voice was a little deeper than normal when he spoke.

“There are several welts from my fingers, and the beginnings of some contusions. I am.. I .. I regret that I have harmed you.” The feel of the cream on his abraded skin caused Jim to suck in his breath. It had several numbing qualities and as Spock spread it gently over him, Jim had to force his toes not to curl.

“Yeah, well I regret that I… did what I did. You know. Earlier.”

“Humans often cannot control such stimulation. I admit, it was a new experience.”

“What was, the fact that I came all over you, or the … ahh, that feels good. The fact that you basically spanked me for my bad behavior?”

Jim watched as Spock’s cheeks flooded with color, the tips of his ears turning almost sage with blood. Jim felt his long, thin fingers on his other cheek and had to bite his lip to keep from moaning at the sensation of the salve as it worked its magic, taking away the sting of the spanking. Which made sense. If people on this planet did this with any frequency, and Uhura’s studies seemed to indicate that they did, then they would need something like this so that they could go about their daily lives. Jim let his eyes drift closed. Spock’s hands were soothing, the cream sending little tingles of sensation over his skin. “I’m sorry about that.” Jim wasn’t sure why he blurted that out the way he did, but he wanted Spock to know. “I’m sorry that I reacted that way. Spock is always telling me that I… hey! Ow!”

Spock moved abruptly, adjusting Jim’s underwear so that they snapped over the top of his ass. The bed dipped and Jim heard Spock move to the adjoining bathroom, hearing the sound of running water. “Captain, I will see you on the shuttlecraft. You are correct. Your posterior region seems to be adequate.” Without another word, Spock unlocked the door and left.

Well, what the fuck was that? Jim gave his butt an experimental wiggle and rolled off the bed, dressing himself in record time.

Damn Vulcan.

***

It was like sitting next a statue. Okay so maybe it was a little childish to take such pleasure in Spock’s obvious discomfort. His First Officer had been so stiff and withdrawn that Jim had thought for a moment that Sarek was sitting next to him in the small shuttlecraft. The trip should have been simple. Fly up to the Enterprise. Pick up some people and grab some spare uniforms. Fly back to the planet. Not for the first time, Jim cursed the fact that they couldn’t just beam what they wanted down to the surface.

Jim was a little distracted when he did the prelaunch checks, shifting slightly in his seat. The salve had done its job, numbing and soothing, but the slight puffy bruises were still tender. Jim had been extremely grateful that no one else had paraded through their quarters while he looked over his shoulder, wiggling his ass so that he could see what Spock had done to him. He had refused to examine the way his stomach had clenched when he saw the slight marks. Spock put those there. Jim had sucked in his breath and quickly straightened his uniform, walking quickly out of the room. Spock had acted like he’d been marred beyond all recognition. It was still his ass, slightly red and a few tiny marks, but nothing to remarkable.

Before walking onto the shuttlecraft, Jim made a point of contacting both Talok to once again ask his permission- a fact that kind of pissed him off, but he could dance to the tune. He didn’t want Pike to regret sending him, especially after his earlier stupid remarks. Talok had seemed pleased at the gesture and had invited Jim to bring a small science team with him upon his return, assuring him that he would find them comfortable surroundings in which to sleep. Jim had also touched base with Uhura. She had sounded almost… giddy. When Jim had told her she had a talented tongue all those years ago, he hadn’t realized how much she got off on all those nuances of new languages. Uhura sounded like a kid who had just been told they could stay up past their bedtime and had practically shooed Jim onto the shuttlecraft.

He and Spock had managed to not acknowledge each other as they took their seats. Jim had taken one of the smaller shuttlecrafts on purpose. With just the three of them flying down it had seemed ridiculous to sign out one of the larger crafts. Without Uhura here, it should have felt like there was more space in the small ship.

It didn’t.

They had just broken the planet’s atmosphere when the buzzer went off.

“Hmm. That’s weird.” Jim made an adjustment to the sensors. “Captain Kirk to Enterprise.” Spock, beside him, saw the inconsistency and made his own adjustments.

“Captain. Several systems are offline. Communications, tactical…”

There was only a split-second of warning. A small electrical charge, looking like a tiny lightning bolt, crackled over the console. Spock was turned away from Jim and wouldn’t see it in time. Jim couldn’t say what he was thinking. He just reacted.

“Spock!” He lunged, pushing the startled Vulcan to the ground. Jim caught a split-second view of the edge of the console, now weeping sparks nanoseconds before his head struck it.

Jim was unconscious before he hit the floor.

He was dreaming again. He had to be. He felt warm, wrapped in heat as though he’d been sunbathing. He felt... cherished. Comforted. Jim moaned a little and burrowed into the warmth. His other senses began to return. Fingers in his hair, stroking his temple, down over his cheek, down his neck and back up. Jim felt little buzzes of sensation when certain spots of his face were touched. His head hurt; the skin on the other side of his face feeling almost singed. He could hear a thrumming sound, a sound that brought to mind the image of a small bird trapped inside a cage. Jim frowned. He was missing something, here but really was too comfortable to think straight. He could taste blood in his mouth, as though he had bitten his tongue.

The fingers on his face ghosted slightly over his mouth and Jim parted his lips, shifting. This had to be the most vivid of all his dreams so far. The feeling had changed. Instead of being erotic, they were… sweet. Jim nuzzled into the hand on his face.

“I did not realize that you had been receiving my… thoughts in your dreams.”

Well that’s it. He definitely was dreaming. Spock would never speak to him like that. Jim had heard a number of bedroom voices in his life, and that was by far the sexiest sound he’d ever heard. Spock’s normally deep voice seemed to wrap around him, submerging Jim in its timbre. The hand on his face flexed for a moment, as though the fingers were making room. It slid back up over Jim’s sweaty hair and over his shoulders, down over his chest.

Jim nodded fuzzily. “Yeah. Dreams’r distracting as hell. Wake up hard. Wanting. Then can’t remember who I’m dreamin about. Then Spock gets mad’t me when I’m late t’work. Don’ like it when he’s mad at me.” Jim could hear the pout in his voice.

The fingers on his chest stalled for a moment before sliding back up over Jim’s shoulder and the side of his neck. Jim shifted his body and for the first time actually realized that he was lying on top of someone, their arms wrapped firmly around him. He tried to sit up, but the arms just held him still, the fingers trailing back up over the side of his face.

“Do not try to move, Jim. You are injured.”

Jim winced, stiffening. The fingers, Spock’s fingers, moved almost desperately over his face and hair again, trying to soothe him back into his previous bonelessness. “Uh, Spock…” Jim tried to move again, but eventually admitted to himself that he didn’t particularly want to.

“I find that I have much for which to apologize.”

“I thought apologizing was illogical, Spock.”

The fingers came down to Jim’s lips again, pressing slightly. “Please. Do not speak.” The tiny bit of exasperation underlying in Spock’s request made Jim grin sleepily. Jim tried to feel miffed, but frankly he was just too damn comfortable. He shrugged instead and tried to relax back into something approximating his earlier sense of comfort.

“I have been having inappropriate dreams about you for several months. Vulcans… do not dream. I was quite unfamiliar with the concept. I had been successfully suppressing my human side for so many years that I had never had the experience before. Once I realized what, and who was featured in the dreams I did try to change my meditation rituals so that they would ... cease.”

Jim blinked. His vision was swimmy. They were still on the shuttlecraft then. He remembered the sensors all going off, and Spock’s calm voice as he reported, then an explosion… did he have a head injury? Was that what was producing this strange … well, whatever this was.

“I found that I reacted… badly to these new sensations.” Spock’s fingers were still pressed against Jim’s mouth. Jim pulled back a little so that he could speak.

“So why would we be dreaming the same thing?” He felt Spock stiffen slightly, and the hand running over his shoulder moved down over his back, stopping at his tailbone before pausing a moment and trailing back up his spine. “Spock, I get that this is uncomfortable for you, but I need to know. How can two people, especially two people who don’t even particularly like each other,” and fuck if it didn’t hurt Jim to admit that, “be dreaming the same thing?”

Spock blew out a breath. Jim could feel it flutter the hair on the top of his head. “I am not efficiently expressing myself.” Spock’s arms fell away from Jim and he sat up, again beginning to feel the stirrings of embarrassment. He’d been sprawled over Spock, who had been sitting on the floor of the shuttlecraft, with his back against the bulkhead. Jim looked around at the shuttle, completely confused.

“Captain. Jim.” Spock’s face was blank as he raised his hand, fingers curving into the familiar melding position. Jim and this Spock had never melded before, but Jim remembered it vividly from his time on Delta Vega. He couldn’t help the flinch. Spock’s eyebrow twitched, rising slightly. His hand fell down to his lap. Jim had to take a minute to make sure he wasn’t rolling his eyes. “God, Spock. Every time one of us does something, it’s like the other takes it in the worst possible way.” Jim reached down and grabbed Spock’s hand. Spock gasped, his eyes widening. “You can do your meld thing. I just want to know what the fuck is going on first. Why are we here? Shouldn’t we be on the Enterprise?”

Jim was completely unprepared for the way that Spock seemed to pale, the slight greenish cast of his skin fading away. In the next second, Spock’s cheeks were positively blooming with color. Even his ears were a dark green. Jim raised his eyebrow, fighting a delighted grin at Spock’s discomfiture. “Oh hell there’s a good story behind that, isn’t there?”

Spock actually bit his lip, his eyes flicking down to their joined hands and back up to Jim’s face. Jim was shocked by the jolt of pure lust that spiked through him at the sight. Spock’s eyes widened a little and it was Jim’s turn to blush. “Just answer the question.” He let go of Spock’s hand and rubbed the back of his neck, feeling like an idiot.

“Actually, if you would allow the meld, I believe your questions can be answered.”

Jim licked his lips. He had no fucking idea what the hell was going on here. He felt like an actor in a play who had not been given his lines. He was just sort of rolling with it. Jim nodded, watching as Spock’s hand came up and settled on Jim’s face. A murmur of sound then-

Nyota puts aside her lyre and looks at him in that way that Spock understands is the human emotion of exasperation. He has had several opportunities to observe it of late.“You just need to tell him, Spock. And you need to do it before he gets too close to that other version of yourself.”

Spock’s hands tighten on his own lyre, causing a most disharmonious sound. “I do not understand why my counterpart insists on fostering this… friendship. It is inappropriate.”

Nyota rolls her eyes. “Oh, stuff it, Spock. Jim is lonely. The Ambassador is giving him something that he needs if he’s going to be able to command effectively. He’s doing what you should be doing! You know this. You’ve had plenty of chances to get to know Jim. I know very well that he’s tried to be your friend. It’s just not in Jim Kirk to be an asshole with someone he works that closely with. Even at the Academy we might have hated how he always screwed up the grading curve, but we liked him, even under all the cockiness. He made me laugh when he wasn’t trying to get into my pants. You know the rest of the crew absolutely adores him. Frankly, you’ve made it pretty clear that you’re not interested in friendship. I’m not surprised he found it somewhere else.” She gives him a look that makes Spock feel uncomfortable, like a gawky youth seeking approval.

Spock sets the delicate instrument aside before he accidentally harms the metal. He just does not understand his reaction to James T. Kirk. He’s observed the young, brash human become an extremely competent captain. And it was true; when they were on the Bridge he and Spock were able to work together, almost seamlessly- as long as neither of them spoke to each other. But these …dreams… of late. His propensity to stare off into space. The way he constantly watched his Captain at the most inopportune times. The worst part was that Spock knew Jim had noticed his regard- but had decided that Spock was actually displeased in his observations when in reality nothing could have been further from the truth.

Nyota sniffs, bringing Spock’s attention back to her. “What we need is some sort of way to get you two alone together. On this ship you have so many distractions, and Jim is never really able to just ignore all his responsibilities. You just need… hmm.” She had trailed off with the most thoughtful look on her face. They had not spoken of the matter again.

Spock hears Jim laugh and the sound is like knives in his chest. He does not like this feeling, this jealous, hateful feeling for the way Jim speaks to his counterpart, at the relaxed, easy way they have with each other. He wants Jim to himself. He wants Jim to want to talk to him that way- but does not know how to accomplish this monumental task.

Then the sensation of falling as Jim scrambled to keep up with the barrage of images. It was like his other meld in the sense that he felt like he was watching the events unfold. Like watching a holovid. Seeing his own outraged look as he looked up at Spock, but feeling…

Intense satisfaction. His hand stings slightly from the force of the blow against Jim’s perfectly rounded posterior. Jim’s emotions are like a low buzz of shock and embarrassment- frustration and desperation. Spock brings his hand down and when Jim jumps against his body his heart starts to pound even more quickly in his side. He watches his hand come down again, the act of violence appalling him yet he can’t seem to stop watching as Jim flinches, bowing his neck and taking each blow with his voice becoming more and more soft with each smack of his hand.

When he realizes that Jim is sexually excited, Spock acts without thinking, tilting his leg so that Jim can get some relief, feel some friction that he desperately needs. Spock wants to be the one to give him this. He hears a clatter of a utensil against a plate and looks up to Talok. He is not sure what expression is on his face, but he says something and the Javoiran clears the room. Logic dictates that he put an end to this immediately, but Jim shifts, moaning and Spock is once again lost.

Jim cannot process everything that bleeds into his mind from the meld. He senses Spock there, wanting something, his nervousness and a fear that the dreams have tied Jim to him somehow- tied him unwillingly. A feeling of sorrow so bright that Jim would have staggered if he were in his body and he doesn’t know what to do but knows Spock is pulling out of the meld and everything will be even worse if he can’t fix this but he doesn’t know what to do so he shoves everything he’s felt, everything he’s hidden-

Shyly wanting Spock’s opinion, his approval. Hopefully asking to share a meal together. A request for a game of chess, to spar in the gym... nothing. He can’t exactly blame Spock for this. Jim had cheated him out of his Captaincy, cheated him out of his mother, his planet his…

A realization that while Spock might never be the friend and confidant the Ambassador had hinted towards, at least duty kept him on his ship. Kept him around Jim.

Jealousy, sick and malignant. Jim doesn’t do jealousy. He doesn’t get attached enough to people to warrant it. He knows Uhura and Spock are together and fuck would it be so bad if he just kept trying? But no. Things are further compounded when he becomes actual friends with Uhura and no. He just can’t. Stupid to keep trying, like some lovesick teenager desperately seeking approval. Things are quiet. Jim tells himself he doesn’t care when he walks into the mess and sees the two of them together, that he’s happy that Uhura is happy.

Eventually he even convinces himself. Until the vague memories of dreams- dreams his subconscious clearly is taunting him with and he starts to lose it. Spock is noticing when he’s late to his shift and (rightfully) calling him on it and god damn it hurts to hear what Spock really thinks about him in those admonishments…

Spock breaks the meld and Jim stares into Spock’s eyes, dumfounded.

“Captain.”

Sulu’s voice causes Jim to gasp. He starts guiltily and gets up onto his knees. He uses the bulkhead to haul himself up to his feet, envying the fluid way Spock does the same.

“Yeah, Sulu. Kirk here.”

“Are you ready to be beamed aboard? The Lieutenant said to comm you about this time.” Jim’s eyes narrowed slightly. He couldn’t help his grin at the way Spock avoided eye contact with him, instead brushing an imaginary piece of lint off of his immaculate uniform.

“Yeah, we’re almost done here. I’ll let you know. Kirk out.” Jim shut off the communicator and stared at Spock until his First Officer met his gaze. “So you two kidnapped me?”

“We engineered events so that you and I could converse without distractions. The system overload was… unexpected.” Spock reached out and touched the small bump on Jim’s temple, his eyes sorrowful. “I regret that you suffered-”

Jim grinned, and the action seemed to startle Spock into tensing, hand still drifting over Jim’s forehead. “I don’t. Remind me to give the Lieutenant a commendation.” He took a step forward and brushed his lips against Spock’s. The jolt at touching him at last went straight through his blood, sending his body tingling. Jim stepped back, all at once remembering the kiss Spock shared with Uhura in the transporter before they beamed aboard the Nadara. Jim had felt horribly uncomfortable at watching such an intimate display of affection on Spock’s part. He hadn’t known where to look. It wasn’t until several weeks later that he had been able to place the emotion he’d felt at watching; jealousy.

Spock made a sound in the back of his throat and stepped forward, the fingers on his forehead sliding down and anchoring Jim’s head for his mouth. This time the kiss was not chaste at all, Jim meeting Spock’s tongue with his own, sliding and tasting each other. Heat blossomed, Jim answered with his own moan pulling Spock’s hips towards him. God Spock’s mouth. For some reason Jim had always thought that Spock would be shy, kind of reticent; his Vulcan heritage keeping him from expressing his wants and desires.

He’d never in his life been so glad to be wrong.

Spock practically fed at Jim’s mouth, the fingers on his neck trailing down Jim’s back over the globes of his ass and pulling him even closer to the heat of Spock’s body. Jim could feel Spock respond, his cock digging into Jim’s hip. Spock’s other hand joined the first, practically kneading the muscle there. It stung a little and Jim hissed, remembering the look on Spock’s face when Jim came and remembering that Spock had yanked Jim’s head up by the hair so that he could watch Jim’s face as he lost it. Fuck that should have been a clue.

Jim tried to ignore the little trickle of responsibility that kept nudging him, but it was persistent enough that he had to pull away from the wet heat of Spock’s mouth. Undeterred, Spock transferred his attention to the line of Jim’s jaw and pulled his body closer into Spock’s, so that their cocks aligned. Jim could hear Spock almost panting as he scraped his teeth over Jim’s skin, as though he couldn’t help tasting him.

“Spock.” His first try was breathy. Jim tried again. “Spock. We need to stop.”

“I find that I do not wish to.”

Jim laughed a little shakily. “Commander.”

“Using my rank as a method of discouraging my current… activity seems to be having the opposite effect. Captain.” Spock bit Jim’s earlobe, sucking it into his mouth. Jim felt his knees threaten to weaken, but forced himself to stand back.

“Kirk to Sulu. Prepare for us to beam aboard.”

Spock raised an eyebrow. He shut his eyes, and Jim could see control returning to his body. Jim smirked and trailed one finger over the bulge in Spock’s trousers, sending Spock’s eyes flying open and his breath huffing out on a startled gasp of sound. “We will discuss your and the Lieutenant’s method of bringing me here later. I’m sure there are several regulations against the sabotaging of Starfleet shuttlecraft and kidnapping of Starfleet personnel.”

“Eighty-four, sir.”

Jim’s grin turned a little bashful as he looked up at his First Officer. “Spock?”

“Yes?”

“I want to talk about this later. When we have the time.”

“Understood.” Spock pulled down his uniform shirts and straightened his shoulders. He and Jim stepped onto the miniature transporter pad and as Jim saw the blinding white light and swirling effect of his molecules being beamed to another location, he saw that Spock’s lips were twisted in a minuscule, but no less adorable, smile.

For Jim.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MOAR.....!